The election is fewer than three weeks away, and Barack Obama has a sizable lead. But that doesn’t mean the race can’t tighten. Obama is ahead—he shouldn’t pander to any voters he knows he won’t get. McCain is behind—but he shouldn’t panic and try any last-minute stunts that might push him ever farther in the red.
Past presidential candidates could have used a bit more restraint. Here are a few more tips, culled from history ….
If you don’t hunt, don’t start now … On Oct. 21, 2004, John Kerry stepped into the Ohio cornfields a politician, and stepped out a hunter and a man. Well, that’s what he wanted voters to think, at least. In a last-minute pander to gun-toting midwesterners, Kerry went on a goose hunt. But the stunt (and let’s face it, it was a stunt) didn’t work. The New York Times‘ summary of the hunting excursion included this stinging sentence: “In fact, the outfit was borrowed, along with the shotgun, from the farm’s owner, and within hours Mr. Kerry was back in tailored suit and rose-colored tie for another photo-op …” Ouch. Barack Obama, for the love of God, stay away from the shotguns! Your attempt at bowling was bad enough!
Birds are scary when they attack from the air … At the 1948 Democratic National Convention, Harry Truman was trailing Thomas Dewey in national polls. Convention organizers had this great idea to boost flagging spirits. And now I quote from the Christian Science Monitor: “Convention planners tried to lift morale at the 1948 Philadelphia convention by releasing doves into the hall. The symbolism backfired. Some doves died in the sweltering heat. Others dive-bombed bemused delegates.” Granted, Truman won the election. But that doesn’t mean the doves weren’t a horrible idea! John McCain, on Tuesday, when you’re at the Forum in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, avoid the temptation to release that clutch of fowl you keep on the Straight Talk Express.
Be careful with those magazine interviews! In the November, 1976 issue of Playboy, Jimmy Carter (honestly) said, “I’ve looked on a lot of women with lust. I’ve committed adultery in my heart many times …” Carter was somehow able to recover from this amazing gaffe, but he did have to defend himself during the presidential debate. Carter got lucky when Gerald Ford said something even more unbelievable (go to 1:00). Note to Obama and McCain: you’ve given enough interviews! There’s no point in giving one more that might blow up in your face! It’s time to act like Sarah Palin.
If you go on a fishing trip, avoid the rabbits … Now this incident might just have done Jimmy Carter in. On April 20, 1979, he was fishing when a swamp rabbit attempted to board his boat. Carter fought the rabbit off with one of his paddles. The press didn’t learn about the incident until late August, when Carter’s press secretary told an Associated Press correspondent about it. And that set off a media frenzy. The press had fun with the story for a week, renaming the bunny a “killer rabbit.” The Washington Post ran the story on the front page, complete with illustration, since the president’s office wouldn’t release photos. Let this be a lesson to you, McCain and Obama! Watch those campaign managers—you can’t have Rick Davis and David Plouffe leaking anything inappropriate at the last minute.
Do not pander to sports fans … Everyone knows Florida is a battleground state. And most people know the Tampa Bay Rays are heading to the World Series to face the Philadelphia Phillies. But everyone certainly knows Barack Obama is from Illinois and John McCain is from Arizona. Neither one should say he is rooting for the Rays, just to try and luck into some votes. After all, Rudy Giuliani tried that last year, saying he was rooting for the Red Sox during last year’s Series when he was campaigning in New Hampshire. Giuliani’s claim that he’s “an American League fan, and I go with the American League team” didn’t turn out too well. Fortunately, Obama has already gone on record saying he only roots for the White Sox. But they’re an American League team! Please don’t change your mind now, Barack.
Above all else, don’t buy 30-minute prime-time commercials … on all four major networks a week before the election that will push back game six of the World Series and look to the American people like you’re bragging about how much money you have to spend when the economy keeps getting worse. Oh, wait.
Tags: boston red sox, gaffes, gerald ford, harry truman, hunting, jimmy carter, john kerry, mccain, obama, pandering, swamp rabbit, tampa bay rays