You can't tell me that a musical, starring this guy, is aimed solely at children.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the top five movies of this weekend were, in order:

—High School Musical 3: Senior Year ($42 million)

—Saw 5 ($30.5 million)

—Max Payne ($7.6 million)

—Beverly Hills Chihuahua ($6.9 million, and AAAARRRGGGG!!!!)

and,

—Pride and Glory ($6.3 million)

You got it: a silver screen blockbuster for preteens and gay men so Disney-fied that the major conflict revolves around whether or not to take early acceptance at Stanford; the umpteenth regurgitation of a slasher film; a live-action VIDEO GAME, fer chrissakes; an ohmygodican’tbelievepeoplearestillwatchingit live-action  chihuahua love story; and a star-studded blue-line drama that, frankly, got terrible reviews.

We deserve everything we’re getting in the financial crisis. As Rev. Wright would say, our chickens are coming home to roost.

Now that I have that out of my system, on to the newsy-news (close cousin to the dancy-dance! We’re inane! We love it! No, really. I love the dancy-dance. Shut up.):

SAG has apparently learned nothing from the mistakes of others, and/or hasn’t gotten the memo that everyone is cutting back, anyway, and probably wouldn’t mind not paying some people for a few months. They hired the mediator the writers used last year. ‘Cause that worked out so well. Oh, Thespians. You’re as bright as your reputation suggests.

But, yay: Netflicks has its eye on all those cutie-pie Mac lovers out there. They have begun testing their new video-streaming program. Movies: coming soon to a lap near you!

Tim Burton is doing a weirdo version of Alice (as in, Wonderland) and CRISPIN GLOVER has signed on! And Depp, and Bonham Carter… Once again, my hopes rise for Burton. He better not disappoint like he did with the last one.

One more yay: because I love all of you, I have taken the trouble to bring you the vrry, vrry new international trailer for Harry Potter, part one thousand. (Jk, we all know it’s seven. Except me. Because I haven’t read any of them and have only seen the movie by Cuaron. Tee hee hee):

Tags: beverly hills chihuahua, harry potter, harry potter 7, monday movie report, pride and glory, sag strike, saw 5, tim burton, Zac Efron