Scrooged, my favorite Christmas movie.

As if the flailing economy weren’t bad enough, it’s snowing across wide swaths of the country, where people aren’t even getting out of the house, for Christmas shopping or movies.

The weekend numbers were down 44 percent from this time last year. Jim Carey’s Yes Man got top honors with $18 mil, followed by another debut, Will Smith’s Seven Pounds, which brought in $16 mil. Kiddie book-turned-flick The Tale of Despereaux took in $11 mil as the family alternative. Looks cute!

The Day the Earth Stood Still came in fourth with $10 mil, and in some sort of holiday… miracle, Four Christmases continued to rack up numbers in its fourth weekend, rounding out the top five with $8 mil.

I go back and forth between adoring (Wedding Crashers, Mr. and Mrs. Smith) and despising (The Break-Up, Fred Claus) Vince Vaughn, but I’m guessing 4XMs would fall into the latter category. Besides, didn’t anyone see the report that watching romantic comedies makes you unhappy? Too much to risk this time of year, as I am teetering on the edge of sanity already.

In other news, more stars are coming out against the strike, which goes to vote in January (results announced on the 23rd). Charlie Sheen has added his name to the list of anti-strikers, which goes against dad Martin’s public position. I would love to be a fly on the wall at their Christmas dinner.

A little shout out to our friends over at /film, who are awesome and made this *amazing* faux trailer for the Thundercats movie we have always wished Hollywood would make. If I could have one wish this Christmas…

Hugh Jackman (Australia, Wolverine) has been tapped to host the Academy Awards this year! It’s a big change from the comedians who have hosted in the past, but Jackman has experience as an emcee, hosting the Tonys for three (very popular) years.  Expect some singin’ and dancin’, but the opening monologue will likely be cut (don’t cry!). As a commenter on The Carpetbagger wrote:

All Hugh Jackman has to do—anywhere at all—is stand there and look delectable and smile (he has a brilliant smile). My God, what a gorgeous man. Double-dipped eye candy. Mmmmmmmm

My thoughts exactly.

In box office news, The Day the Earth Stood Still blew away the competition, bringing in $31 mil over the weekend. Runner-up Four Christmases came away with a third of that. ($13 mil). A familiar trio rounded out the top five: Bolt, Twilight, and Australia, with $8, $7.5, and $4 mil, respectively.

The weekend was down 50 percent from last year. The problem is that the newest releases just aren’t performing. Australia was a disappointment. Punisher 2 was barely a blip on the box office radar. Nothing Like the Holidays (which I couldn’t place at first, but is the cute-looking Debra Messing/John Leguiszamo xmas comedy) came in seventh in its opening weekend. The animated Delgo (heard of it?) made a small history this weekend, as the least-grossing film to ever open on over 2,000 screens. Congratulations?

That said, there are a lot of limited releases out now which might be making an appearance at that Jackman event in February. Milk, Frost/Nixon, Doubt, and Gran Torino are all performing well.

Speaking of Jackman, the Wolverine trailer just launched on MySpace. Take a peek:

November has been a long string of weekends finishing ahead of last year’s numbers.

In movies, that is.

The Thanksgiving long weekend was no exception, with audiences flocking to see a range of new releases, from the treacly (Four Christmases, $32 mil ) to the teen-y (Twilight, $27 mil) to the family-friendly (Bolt, $26 mil) to the action-packed (Quantum of Solace, $20 mil) to the Oscar-contending (Australia, $16 mil). A little something for everyone, so to speak.

The real news of the moment, though (as much as I would love to dwell on happy-go-lucky box offices numbers), is the impending actors’ strike.

Sharon Waxman broke the story this weekend about a meeting, “like a scene from one of the Godfather movies” of the biggest names in acting in the last thirty years – a meeting that happened (if it happened) before AFTRA cut its deal. Continuing to negotiate without AFTRA was at least a step toward a strike.

Meanwhile, 17 thousand people have signed a “No SAG Strike” online petition, including Bill Murray, Cybil Shepherd, Jessica Biel, and Jason Patric.

SAG leadership is expected to ask for strike authorization in the coming weeks, despite intense pressure from the economy (officially in recession) and industry insiders and dependents still smarting from last Christmas’ WGA strike.

In case you hadn’t heard, Twilight completely sucked at the box office. Yes, it sucked the young, female blood of American capitalism in the dark, cool night of the weekend to the tune of $71 million. This is, in the land of Hollywood power brokers, big news. More on that, as Marketplace says, “after the numbers…”

Apparently, so-so reviews didn’t sap too much of Bond’s strength. Quantum Of Solace pulled in over $27 mil in its second domestic weekend. US total: $110 mil. Worldwide: $418 million!

Poor Bolt. Not only did he get lost and have to find out he wasn’t really a superdog, he also had to open against a bunch of vampires and Bond’s second week. He did okay, pulling in $27 mil. Hardly a success by Disney standards, for now, but execs are expecting it to do well over the family, er, holiday, weekend.  (Side note: I have been seeing commercials for Bolt for what seems like months, but it wasn’t until last week that I finally caught that this movie is IN 3-D! Two points: A) Seriously, crap job marketing that, Disney. I definitely should have realized that earlier. B) Is 3-D really going to make it? I saw Beowulf last year, and, yes, it was absolutely friggin’ horrible, but the 3-D was kind of cooooool! I dug it. Kind of makes me want to go see Bolt…)

Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa continued to bring the crowds over the weekend, adding $16 mil to its coffers. Perhaps it’s maintaining momentum on the basis of its “So nice, you should see it twice” ad campaign. The flick has a lot going for it: franchise name-recognition, famous voices (Ben Stiller, Chris Rock, David Schwimmer), and, obviously, talking animals, which tend to do well (see: Chihuahua, Beverly Hills).

Finally, Role Models rounded out the pack, taking $7 mil from whatever audience was left. Not exactly Anchorman status, but RM is doing pretty well in the face of some tough competition.

Now, back to Twilight: If you haven’t noticed, ladies aren’t the treasured audience that the boys are. Transformers, James Bond (although one could argue he’s for the ladies, these days), Hellboy—all marketed to the swinging dicks that produce them. Warner Brothers made news earlier this year by saying they would no longer produce movies with female leads.

Sell now, WB stockholders.

Twilight’s stellar opening, with 65 percent of the audience female, suggests that women can drive box office success, a notion that was hinted at when Sex and the City and Mamma Mia broke into the top ten grossers earlier this year. (In contrast, zero movies with female leads made it into the top ten in 2007… or in 2006… in 2005, Mr. and Mrs. Smith eeked its way into the ten spot. 2004: none. 2003: none. 2002: My Big Fat Greek Wedding (!). 2001: none. 2000: none. Seeing a pattern here?)

Unlike those other two movies, though, Twilight has neither big-name stars nor an audience over 30. This is not your mom’s chick flick. With a box office take of $71 mil in its first weekend, and reportedly costing about $35 mil to produce, you can expect Hollywood’s movers and shakers to take note, and a rash of pics marketed to young women to hit the market in three… two… one…

That is, if there is anyone left to act in them! SAG leadership is seeking authorization from its members for a walk-out since the weekend mediation session stalled. Tucked inside this little nugget of gossip are allegations that the AMPTP hasn’t been honoring its residuals deal with the WGA, which, if you recall, went on strike last year over the same issue.

Given the economic conditions, the failure of last year’s strike, and the apparent unwillingness of the AMPTP to budge on the issue, SAG leadership might want to ask themselves if this is really the best next step.

He came, he we saw, he conquered. James Bond took in $70 mil over the weekend, the biggest Bond opening ever in the franchise’s almost 50-year history. (The film has already taken in $322 mil worldwide.) He’s number 1!

Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa passed the $100 million mark in its second weekend, adding another $36 mil to its cume.

For those who weren’t interested in Bond, R-rated comedy Role Models was the next best thing, pulling in another $12 mil in its second weekend.

High School Musical: 3 held on to the number four spot, and Changeling rounded out the top five in its fourth weekend in theaters. I haven’t seen either of them, don’t plan on seeing either of them, and am tired of both of them.

Interesting aside: Variety’s website is chock o’ block full of Oscar ads for… The Dark Knight! Wouldn’t *that* be awesome? TDK has already won one prestigious award: it’s the only movie I’ve seen not once, but twice at the theater.

The Jim Henson Company is making new. The Muppets took over the Today show on Thursday, which is about the cutest thing ever, AND the company has teamed up with Guillermo del Toro for a stop-motion Pinocchio. The flick probably won’t hit theaters for another three years or so, but this picture ought to pique your curiosity. (It’s never to early to start building buzz, right?)

Finally, to brighten your day, here are the Muppets:

Well, W. has come and gone, in more ways than one, and we’re in that sweet spot of post-election, pre-holiday movie fare, when the top five films look like the DVD collection of an 18-year-old girl: cartoons, musicals, comedies. We’re not hittin’ the hard stuff again ’til the eggnog is all gone.

Our number 1 this week is Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa, bringing home $64 million in warthog bacon, besting the year’s other big-name animated, Wall-E. (And, actually, I heard Mad 2 Africa was pretty good.)

Role Models apparently brought in the non-cartoon-or-musical crowd and their $19 million. (The surprising thing about it doing so well is that people were surprised it did so well, especially given the competition. There is a lesson to be learned here, children: timing is everything).

High School Musical: 3 (The one that Is actually a big-screen movie), merrily rode along to the tune of another $9 mil, bringing its three-week total to $76…. million… dollars. I beg the parents of America: do not let this movie pass $100 million. I swear to God I will cry, and you really don’t want to see that.

You apparently also don’t really want to see Changeling, which came out last week. The Eastwood-helmed drama (starring little-known actress Angelina Jolie), which you may have heard about despite the fact that MMR took last week off (for some pre-election drinking), trudged its way to number 4, with $7 million (two week total: $21 mil, or the approximate monthly household expenses for the Jolie-Pitt family). The film is, however, a runaway winner in the category for Hardest to Watch Movie Starring Angelina Jolie. Hell, Gia was uplifting compared to this.

And, finally, the movie which dared not speak its name, Zach and Miri Make a P*rno (that’s P-O-R-N-O) rounded out our top 5 in its second week! Congratulations, K. Smith! You are relevant again! I missed you so much! Now, put down that sandwich and enjoy life while you still have some in you.

In other news, this is the week that Bond (James… Bond) will grace us again with his masculine presence! Squeeeee! *sigh*. It’s too early to start holding your breath, but I’ll let you know when to start… maybe… now! (We’re so close!)

Chevy Chase, Burt Reynolds, and Michael Madsen walk onto a set together… no, this isn’t the start of a joke (at least, not until I’ve seen it), it’s the auspicious beginning for Not Another Not Another Movie. Of course, at various times, I’ve loved all those guys… except Reynolds, he always creeped me out, so maybe it won’t be that bad? A girl can hope, right?

It’s okay… I still have this (and, yes, I downloaded it to my iPod):

You can't tell me that a musical, starring this guy, is aimed solely at children.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the top five movies of this weekend were, in order:

—High School Musical 3: Senior Year ($42 million)

—Saw 5 ($30.5 million)

—Max Payne ($7.6 million)

—Beverly Hills Chihuahua ($6.9 million, and AAAARRRGGGG!!!!)

and,

—Pride and Glory ($6.3 million)

You got it: a silver screen blockbuster for preteens and gay men so Disney-fied that the major conflict revolves around whether or not to take early acceptance at Stanford; the umpteenth regurgitation of a slasher film; a live-action VIDEO GAME, fer chrissakes; an ohmygodican’tbelievepeoplearestillwatchingit live-action  chihuahua love story; and a star-studded blue-line drama that, frankly, got terrible reviews.

We deserve everything we’re getting in the financial crisis. As Rev. Wright would say, our chickens are coming home to roost.

Now that I have that out of my system, on to the newsy-news (close cousin to the dancy-dance! We’re inane! We love it! No, really. I love the dancy-dance. Shut up.):

SAG has apparently learned nothing from the mistakes of others, and/or hasn’t gotten the memo that everyone is cutting back, anyway, and probably wouldn’t mind not paying some people for a few months. They hired the mediator the writers used last year. ‘Cause that worked out so well. Oh, Thespians. You’re as bright as your reputation suggests.

But, yay: Netflicks has its eye on all those cutie-pie Mac lovers out there. They have begun testing their new video-streaming program. Movies: coming soon to a lap near you!

Tim Burton is doing a weirdo version of Alice (as in, Wonderland) and CRISPIN GLOVER has signed on! And Depp, and Bonham Carter… Once again, my hopes rise for Burton. He better not disappoint like he did with the last one.

One more yay: because I love all of you, I have taken the trouble to bring you the vrry, vrry new international trailer for Harry Potter, part one thousand. (Jk, we all know it’s seven. Except me. Because I haven’t read any of them and have only seen the movie by Cuaron. Tee hee hee):

Variety is reporting that Medusa, Silvio Berlusconi’s production company has inked a co-production deal with Cuba. They are calling it an “Italo-Cuban co-production treaty,” and I’m calling it the restoration of Italians to the vanguard of film.

Madonna’s directorial debut, Filth and Wisdom came out in the U.S. this weekend to decidedly mixed reviews. In a malicious twist of scheduling, Rockandrolla, Guy Ritchie’s new film, is also now out. The New Yorker does us the pleasure of reviewing the movies side by side. Unfortunately for Guy, although he seems to have roundly trumped the soon-to-be-ex-Mrs. Ritchie, no one seems to think he’s lived up to his status as an actual, um, director.

This could be causing problems for Rockandrolla’s Joel Silver, Sharon Waxman notes. Apparently, the producer’s Midas touch in the 80s and 90s (Predator, Lethal Weapon(s), The Matrix) has tarnished some, with a string of expensive flicks that aren’t giving back to the studio, including Speed Racer, The Brave One, and a whole bunch of other movies you probably didn’t see. But, fear not, Silver fans, as Waxman cynically notes that, “Hollywood is a big old boy’s club, and Joel Silver is a big old member of it. Protected by his mogul friends, with whom he shares vacations and cruises and weddings in Venice, Silver continues to keep his deal at Warner Brothers…”

Lakeshore Entertainment and MGM are remaking Fame! Kevin Tancharoen, director of Britney’s “Toxic”, will helm. On that basis alone, I vote “yea.” 

And, BO numbers:

If you’ve been wondering why Mark Wahlberg has been wandering around the set of SNL this week, you might notice that he stars in Max Payne, an adaptation of the video game of the same name. The best review of it is probably this one, from Spy the Plumber, on IMDB. Extra-special credit for using the line, “There isn’t as much depth to her in the film as there was in the game.”

Payne made off with the weekend, with that god-awful chihuahua nipping at its heels.

Dakota Fanning and Queen Latifah came up $100,000 behind the animated rat-dog with The Secret Life of Bees, another adaptation, this one of a book that everyone and my mother told me to read, but I still haven’t gotten around to. Despite the suggestion in the title that it’s saccharine-sweet, the book, and the flick, have gotten solid reviews.

Oliver Stone’s much-anticipated W came in a respectable, but not great number four. Maybe we’re just dealing with a little bit of political overload?

And, finally, Eagle Eye held tough at number five.

One more month!

I know. Columbus Day was yesterday. I took it off to give a bunch of people smallpox and claim that Catalina was Hawaii, but I’m back now!

Here’s your long-awaited weekly round-up of Hollywood news (silver screen only, please):

Up yours, Murdoch! Just last week I was telling you that Spielberg (d.b.a. “Dreamworks”) had officially severed ties to Paramount. Well, yesterday Dreamworks and Universal announced that they were reuniting for a 7-year distribution deal. Spielberg said in the release: “it feels great to come home again, it feels like I never left.” I guess we’re going to forget about that little 3-year fling with Paramount. Ugh. I bet Spielberg could barely look at himself in the mirror.

In related news, David Geffen appears to be retiring? Hahahahaha, no. Old moguls never die, they just find new hobbies. Can I just be the first to say: Buy the LA Times, Mr. Geffen!! Zell has to have driven the price down since the last time you thought about it…

SQUEEEEEEE!!!! Jean-Claude van Damme wrote, directs and stars in a flick filming now in Thailand (and, omg, if I still lived there, I would so be tracking his tight ass down!), and slashfilm has the pics and plotlines. I’m sure it’s going to be really, really bad, but I don’t care. I love him, and I say “Bravo!” to 80s action-heroes trying to reinvent their careers!

Whoo-hoo! Don Cheadle is set to replace Terrence Howard in the upcoming Iron Man sequel, which bothers some, but I think is awesome. Howard skeeves me out. And Cheadle, well, say no more.

More news about people I hate: Michael Moore (shut up, pinko-commie-leftists: he’s an ass) is filming in Canada (where he should stay) for his follow-up to Fahrenheit 9-11, due out next summer. Killer quote of the day: “I’m trying to break this down very simply for Americans, who basically have a hard time understanding how to vote themselves.”

And, seriously, I am really, really trying to keep it in my pants, but I just saw the poster at a bus stop last night, and now this!! Go ahead, drink it in. Quantum of Solace comes out just one short month from today!

Aaaaaand, weekend BO:

It pains me to say it, but the Taco Bell dog led the pack again this week (I’m sorry. If it makes you feel better, that’s one of the tamer puns to come out of this travesty of American culture), taking in another $17.5 million.

New-comer “Quarantine,” starring nobody you’ve ever heard of and directed by same, followed with $14 million, while “Body of Lies,” starring Russell Crowe and Leo Decaprio and directed by Ridley Scott, trailed with just under $13 million.

I am really starting to think that adults don’t go to movies. Maybe we’re just more likely to stay home and watch YouTube?

Rounding out the top five were “Eagle Eye” with $11 million (Shia LaBoef, hanging tough!) and “Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist,” with $6.4.

For those of you who have been following the MMR’s religion-related obsession, “Fireproof” managed to hang on to tenth, bringing in another $3 million in its third weekend. “Religilous” eeked out another $2.2, but given the rave reviews, I wouldn’t be surprised if it opened on a few more screens sometime soon.

If the fiasco on Wall Street wasn’t enough to convince you that the world as you know it is coming to an end, I have the proverbial straw you’ve been looking for:

Beverly Hills Chihuahua IS NUMBER ONE AT THE BOX OFFICE. I repeat: Beverly Hills Chihuahua IS NUMBER ONE AT THE BOX OFFICE. Jamie Lee Curtis is laughing all the way to the bank.

Eagle Eye held on, dropping just one spot to number two.

The low-budget Sony pic Nick and Nora’s Infinite Playlist, starring Michael Cera and Kat Dennings, debuted at number three. It took in $12 million, just shy of its $13 million price tag.

Last week’s number two film, Nights in Rodanthe, hung on to number four.

“Appaloosa,” starring “A History of Violence” alums Ed Harris and Viggo Mortensen, ended its third week at number five. Despite mixed reviews, I still want to see it. Maybe because I am in love with Viggo Mortensen, but maybe because it just looks good? [ED NOTE-Viggo is the hotness!]

Interestingly, Bill Maher’s new flick, Religulous, came in at a very respectable number ten, taking $3.5 million over the weekend, but in an ironic twist, Fireproof, the Christian film starring Kirk Cameron, continued to fair respectively at the BO. The New York Times calls the former a “healthy marriage of faith and film-making.” I guess that would make Maher’s film a dysfunctional one?)

It has been announced that Michael Douglas will receive the AFI’s “Lifetime Achievement Award” in June. Was anyone else completely unaware that he produced One Flew Over the Cukoo’s Nest (and Flatliners?!?!)? My image of him is greatly burnished having learned that. Still, though, if there is a Lifetime Achievement Award due, it should probably go to his plastic surgeon. Yikes. (Just kidding, Mr. President. You know I love you.)

Spielberg and Geffen have left the building! They, along with exec Stacey Stiner, have officially severed ties with Paramount, whose parent company Viacom bought DreamWorks SKG three years ago. Spielberg and Stiner are taking some as-yet-unnamed Paramount flicks with them to a new company. Geffen’s plans are under works. (BTW, Katzenberg, the third initial of DreamWorks SKG, will remain at the helm of DreamWorks Animation Studios, which is traded separately.)

It’s hard to talk about the BO numbers and high-powered execs without noting that movie-news staple Variety is leading with the headline “Wall Street Takes Another Tumble.” Historically, movie attendance has risen during times of economic crisis, primarily because we’d rather see someone’s troubles resolved in 100 minutes than think about our own, I suspect, but while attendance, and its helpful friend, box office returns, will likely remain strong, smaller, more credit-dependent production houses will inevitably face struggles in the months ahead, as it becomes more and more difficult to secure financing. Stay tuned for the M&A’s to come…

Let’s talk Jamie Lee Curtis. Say who? Yeah, her. She’s working the media circuit to promote her latest and greatest box office killer—wait for it, wait for it—Beverly Hills Chihuahua. How this has anything to do with Curtis polling Rachael Ray’s audience for lactation and then crying out like an infant in the middle of an interview is . . . quite reasonable, really. Let me repeat: She’s promoting a film called Beverly Hills Chihuahua. [ED note-So totes going to see it!]

Paris Hilton’s new reality show, “Paris Hilton My New BFF,” debuted on MTV this past Tuesday. Over 300,000 freak shows put themselves on the web to compete for a spot on the program and 18 made the cut. They’ll face a new series of challenges each week (resisting the urge to throw a Choo at Her-Royal-Hilton ain’t one of them, but should be) and one lucky soul will be eliminated at the end of every show. How? With Hilton waving a wand and chirping “TTYN!” (ICYMI: That’s TXT MSG speak for “Talk to you never!”) But wait— it gets worse.

A slew of celebs have decided to use their starpower for the good of democracy. How that translates into Jessica Alba going all Hannibal on us is beyond me, but at least these celebs are promoting a decent cause. They’re all participating in the Declare Yourself campaign, which aims to get droves of young peeps to the polls in November. If all goes well, these peeps will actually know a thing or two about—oh, I don’t know—McCain’s baffling voting record, historic Supreme Court cases, the fact that humans and dinosaurs did not co-exist. (You know, all the stuff a certain Alaska governor is a wee-bit confused about.)

Diddy, of course, had to do the promote-the-vote thing in his own Diddy way—that is, with a Diddy vlog. In it, we see him huffing, puffing, and hiding underneath the bedsheets, with a flashlight illuminating his face, while pondering-stressing-freaking over the implications of Palin’s inability to name a single newspaper or magazine that she reads on a regular basis. “She’s worse than the boogeyman!” Diddy screams. Diddy may be crazy, but on this one—pass the flashlight. Boyfriend’s got a point.

An SF judge gave Sharon Stone the neurotic nutjob stamp of approval in court on Tuesday. Stone was hoping the judge would allow her to move her son from SF (where he currently resides with his father) to her home in LA. Not only did she get shot down, but was pretty much labeled an unfit parent by the court. It’s kind of unclear why; I mean, doesn’t everyone suggest their child get botox injections to cure a smelly foot problem?

Quote of the Week: “I’m a 45-year-old rock star and I’m worried about being tardy,” said Red Hot Chili Peppers bassist, Flea, to MTV on Tuesday. Newsflash: Flea’s schooling it up at USC while the band is on hiatus. (Did anybody else know this?) He’s a regular ol’ freshman and even wears a backpack to boot! All together now: “Awww . . .”

Sharon Stone photo via source.